Subject: The Oxford Dictionary's latest definition

orth

The Oxford Dictionary's latest definition of the
; V+ K" g9 F% Mfollowing words.
% x/ d' y1 l8 R( q- {+ J1 Z) L
8 [3 \" M) S$ s; J
& w- B5 Q$ g6 w*Divorce:
6 I, T' _; s  T  A*Future tense of marriage*
/ Y! I# V  F9 I" a; @7 F
9 T3 f. J# U; q2 k* \6 O6 I% F2 LCigarette:
  g9 F- T; Y1 u3 i' ]0 ]8 h7 |. Z*A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire
9 h* ?) P# r4 Q9 [/ Q- O% s/ B8 w% wat one end and a fool on the other. *

Lecture:
*An art of transferring information from the
( ^: }6 c- F, S$ m( }notes of the lecturer to the notes of the
students without passing through the minds
of either.*
( d8 L5 w: _" g$ C, P
5 X& e5 k, m( E$ H( zCompromise:
*The art of dividing a cake in such a way that
everybody believes he got the biggest piece.*

4 \! @; e# N# n" ETears:
+ j5 @5 g' C  V8 _6 w*The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power
is defeated by feminine water power.*

# B0 Q4 q& N! H& @
+ N& b% x9 O* ]Dictionary:
' V7 K8 W, |- j/ {( \* Y*A place where success comes before work.*

2 x/ m; W+ i$ @; N) {6 `) d! BConference Room:
*A place where everybody talks, nobody listens
and everybody disagrees later on.*
% ^/ v* X  A: V/ T5 t; A
3 W7 X1 f$ j( i% D; M
Classic:
*A book which people praise, but do not read.*

Smile:
*A curve that can set a lot of things straight.*
/ ]6 d% ?0 A+ y9 k
* M* I5 ^: ?! o
8 b& z# @* e, A) TOffice:
* A  q2 [1 k4 j) b* I# ^8 I* R*A place where you can relax after your strenuous home
life.*
) J* z4 q1 p: i0 @7 C$ z+ k
! \& f. q* n5 I' P9 GYawn:
*The only time some married men ever get to open their
3 o+ C0 A% f% c3 [" V. tmouth.*


Etc:
; n. v+ g. M5 V1 g*A sign to make others believe that you know more than
you actually do.*
5 M/ O) x+ v9 N, r$ D5 p
1 u3 ^! D& X3 m
7 r+ p- [6 O, q' M% dCommittee:
*Individuals who can do nothing individually and
: \( Z& \0 p$ C% m! G! t; vsit to decide that nothing can be done together.*

, \4 r4 J: [1 p+ n5 I& SExperience:
*The name men give to their mistakes.*


Atom Bomb:
*An invention to end all inventions.*
# \  M' z6 z( R: m! F
Philosopher:
*A fool who torments himself during life, to be
spoken of when dead.*


Diplomat:
*A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way
that you actually look forward to the trip.*

1 x1 p: ^& j8 Y- \, I" X
; z5 g0 \; |( q2 K' v% F- s; cOpportunist:
*A person who starts taking a bath if he accidentally
# D5 C3 b" g9 a+ I2 vfalls into a river.*
9 t; g2 T) u$ E% c
8 U; v2 V4 n8 x0 b! SOptimist:
: v7 F4 r  }# j7 h. k  j*A person who while falling from Eiffel tower says in
% H, M% U/ t9 w$ i: @6 ^midway 'See I am not injured yet!!' *

7 n/ h3 C) x0 l/ M/ Q1 \! _
4 w5 {' G8 C! M/ _, IMiser:
; }4 S' C) q% m, g*A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.*
' \( c5 }9 y( {1 c7 z' _% w
Father:
*A banker provided by nature.*
. `* a. G4 p. q( D8 X

9 Y( u/ m4 }0 T8 WCriminal:
*A guy no different from the rest...except that he got
3 \1 I5 a; A8 C8 ^! tcaught.*
/ D. T/ P6 Y( \6 x
1 u* x1 o( O9 W- q# P1 j3 SPolitician:
*One who shakes your hand before elections and your
confidence after.*

2 A! f  H1 A7 T! m6 g5 n
; Z# W; q+ c8 m0 j  O2 ?  pDoctor:
*A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills
you with his bills.*

7 ]2 S2 E9 {. O; X- D' vBoss:
*Someone who is early when you are late and late
when you are early.*

samsammi

$送花$ $送花$ $送花$

Arterix

ROTFL!!!!
I love it, the English humour!
So black!

吉粒粒

:D :D $支持$ $送花$