几个英语成人笑话

Bagwell

Relationships are hard
    It's like a full-time job, and we should treat it like one.
( @" p8 k" A; `% H    If your boyfriend or girlfriend wants to leave you, they should give you two weeks' notice.
    There should be severance pay, and before they leave you, they should have to find you a temp.
    -Bob Ettinger

Bagwell

Best birth control

' s1 O4 V8 h6 F2 s' |& V+ K, f"Do you know what the best birth control in the world is?"
: H' V4 b$ t. P/ n5 d+ K    "No."
$ j  y# d7 l9 F3 q/ N/ ^: c) U0 D    "That's right."

Bagwell

Im sorry Maam
/ x5 c' u) {  u' N
    A man is in a hotel lobby and wants to ask the desk clerk a question.
    As he turns to go to the front desk, he accidentally bumps into a woman beside him, and as he does his elbow goes into her breast. They are both quite startled.
8 l% H, [2 O/ C( C3 e5 _$ f$ F    The man turns to her and says, "Ma'am, if your heart is as soft as your breast, I know that you'll forgive me."
    She replies, "If your dick is as hard as your elbow, I'm in room 436."

Bagwell

You would look nicer这个是雅俗共享
* k% F3 m& c& F( a    "How did you lose your job at the dress shop?" a woman asked her friend.
    "Well, after trying on about 25 dresses, the customer said to me, 'I think I would look nicer in something flowing.'
) B. S/ W6 f  p! f    "And I suggested the Mississippi."

Bagwell

Get hard
; V5 B8 g& W5 V" I3 h
2 R3 p* M/ ~2 {* t) P    What did the egg say to the boiling water?
0 ?% S0 ^! l3 a% Z    How am I suppose to get hard... I just got laid 10 minutes ago!

Bagwell

Love, true love etc  good one

    What's the difference between love, true love and showing off?
+ Y& Q  D, Z9 r) N- `8 h    Spitting, swallowing and gargling.

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