Good News and Bad News

tommy-chen

:D 看到一个笑话,让大家也乐乐
The soldiers had been marching and fighting,they were very dirty ,hot and tired.
One day,the General announced:"My men,I have some good news and some bad news for you
) v( |: y2 I% F) {$ Swhich one would you like first?" "the good news!" they all shouted. "OK." said the General "the good
  |/ A9 Q+ A: @news is that you will  each be receiving a complete change of clouthing"
% G* ?  g6 _- y- c4 ^"Hurrah!"chorused the soldiers."and now for the bad news,Jack,you will change with John.John,you will change
with Tom.Tom,you will change with***.and *** will change with .......

goldfish

A man drinks a shot of whiskey every night before bed.

& p) \1 B5 A5 Z' y8 CAfter years of this the wife wants him to quit, so she gets two shot glasses, fills one with water the other with whiskey.

9 _) ?+ v6 k+ ^3 z4 \She gets him to the table with the glasses and has his bait box there too.
She says "I want you to see this."
. G% ]/ M' X: ^0 m' k4 b: S: xShe puts a worm in the water it swims around.
; _0 G% M( X7 E: `She puts a worm in the whiskey and the worm dies.

Sternly the wife remarks, "So what do you have to say about this experiment?"

Cooly the husband replies, "If I drink whiskey, I won't get worms!"

tommy-chen

我也刚看到一个,顶楼上!!

7 b, L( E! t% E1 |  P+ aohye$ok$ ,再来一个
9 j$ }5 L* k( S$ e4 x6 D' V1 C/ B一位来自日本的旅客，坐出租车去机场的路上，看到一辆汽车经过，就说：“oh，TOYOTA！Made in Japan! It is very fast！”又有一辆经过，他又说： “oh，NISSAN！Made in Japan! It is very fast！”司机有点不高兴，觉得他太吵了！当第三辆经过时，他还是说：“oh，HONDA！Made in Japan! It is very fast！”

' b6 b0 c* ]% @  v9 b后来到了机场，那个日本人就问：“How Much？”出租车司机说：“1000！”
2 ^0 J5 x3 K4 L# j$ }  T
. ]- m8 K5 {' h- O日本人惊奇的问司机：“为什么那么贵？”出租车司机回答说：“oh，mileometer（计 程表）！Made in Japan! It is very fast！”
:D :D :D

tommy-chen

中国建设银行——CBC (Construction Bank of China) ——“存不存？”
中国银行　　——BC （Bank of China）——“不存。”
中国农业银行——ABC (Agriculture Bank of China)— —“啊，不存”
中国工商银行——ICBC (Industry and Commercial Ba nk of China)——“爱存不存”
/ C. ~% g0 Y5 c招商银行　　——CMBC——“存吗？？白痴！”
$ S; H7 A5 ^% F% ^兴业银行　　——CIB——“存一百”
北京市商业银行——BCCB (Beijing City Commercial B ank)——白存存不？”
汇丰银行　　——（HSBC）还是不存”