GREETING CARDS THAT NEVER GOT PRINTED

tonyline007

I always wanted to have someone to love.  And now that you've come into my life...
(Inside card) - I've changed my mind.

I must admit, you brought religion into my life...
) [! o2 ?7 p: F2 S5 p7 r9 \% ^" e(Inside card) - I never believed in Hell until I met you.
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0 r5 M5 V/ z$ S" t0 }/ cAs the days go by, I think how lucky I am....
6 g6 z! M0 a8 p( Y7 b(Inside card) - …That you're not here to ruin it for me.

Congratulations on your promotion. Before you go....
(Inside card) - Will you take the knife from my back? You'll probably need it again.
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5 H. a$ p' `4 [: S; D. xCongratulations on your new bundle of joy....
(Inside card) - Did you ever find out who the father was?

( h2 ^* t; |. ]( CYou are such a good friend. If we were on a sinking ship and there was only one life jacket...
- T( I' p' X# |: E) K. w# m0 h9 B(Inside card) - I'd miss you terribly and think of you often.

1 k! S4 d1 Y4 v6 p5 u- @, rLooking back over the years that we have been together, I can't help but wonder.....
(Inside card) - What the hell was I thinking
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' V( d7 U- g& r% s- W$ O7 hThank you for being part of my life.....
/ N; K4 |: O$ }' n) |3 P/ a(Inside card) - I never knew what evil was until I met you!
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( j! n/ U' i& c1 U9 s: o. sCongratulations on your wedding day!
(Inside card) - Too bad no one likes your husband.  

Hooray.....
2 _2 X7 k1 W" V& K- J2 M+ d(Inside card) - You're divorced.
" S/ G6 k! @# V- |I just want you to know that I'm sorry for what happened...
! V+ B$ H, g  s, v(Inside card) - Especially since you survived.

Congrats on getting married...
# `9 B# {8 o6 k" v; @9 V(Inside card) - It's not everyday you decide to ruin your life.

9 [- e5 h) q9 g9 G. o; eSomeday I hope to marry...
/ k+ K$ S* e+ W! Q1 o2 k% g* W(inside card) - Someone other than you.
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) H5 n4 [* ?+ Q  G9 Z% X+ o/ Z1 oWe have been friends for a very long time...
3 T+ X8 S! m( O5 F( @(inside card) - What do you say we stop?

5 w- u4 V% W1 m- ]0 |, m" {AND MY THREE PERSONAL TOP FAVOURITES:
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, g1 l* @1 w# j' S3 @Your friends and I wanted to do something special for your birthday...
# L# }/ P) @) ^: H" N( [) L(Inside card) - So we're having you put to sleep.
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$ `. a% t  a( P- y% ^0 {: EWhen we were together, you said you'd die for me...
(Inside card) - Now we've broken up, I think it's time to keep your promise.

* B9 `; z% A5 F# GLastly, for any friends in California or who have too much money:
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Happy Birthday! You look great for your age....
/ X/ O4 l- g+ b; N4 j(Inside card) - Almost lifelike!
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